Image via @Whitney Museum of American Art
I’m a bit behind in my Pippi Project posts, aren’t I? If I have any excuse, it’s this: life has been flowing much too quickly for me to stop and capture it on the page. These events have had me happily tumbling after them, this one and then that, not unlike the fireflies I used to chase in the late summer evenings of my childhood, mason jar at the ready, poised for capture.
And now my symbolic mason jar is stuffed full with the lanterns of the insect world, and I have stopped to catch my breath. And to tell you this: you can do it.
Whatever it is. You can do it. I have learned, in just a few short months—after years of half-believing, years filled with whining and evading and generally ignoring my truth—that if you insist on being radically honest with yourself about what makes you tick, and you move toward only that, in each moment…well, it’s like magic. And the result is more beautiful than 1,000 fireflies whirling above your head.
For the sake of brevity, I’ll sum it up in one sentence: as of last week, I am now able to fully support myself with writing, and on-camera work, which is my dream come true. For someone who, just over a year ago was knee-deep in an unfulfilling career that I didn’t think I’d ever have the courage to leave, that’s nothing short of a miracle.
I’ve joined a luxury lifestyle publication as an editor/producer (does it get any better than that for me?) and have been brought on board as one of Mahalo.com’s cooking hosts, where I show viewers how to make guacamole, and open champagne bottles without impaling anyone:
My dear friend Eva sweetly posted one of my videos on her Facebook page, declaring that statistically speaking, if her other friends weren’t “in possession of a burgeoning celebrity” they probably weren’t tight. This is because her other close friend, Kartina is changing the landscape of cinema critique, and is racking up mentions in The New Yorker along the way. So between the two of us, we had created a high likelihood that if you were close to Eva, your star was rising.
Now, this was an embarrassing comparison, one I didn’t feel worthy of being part. Kartina is doing important, smart things on the internet, like discussing race and cinema, and here I am opening champagne bottles in a way that my husband referred to as “suggestive”. Very different, indeed. And at first, my impulse was to feel ashamed that my contribution to the interweb wasn’t more high-minded. But then, I remembered: as much as I wish it were, that’s not me. And therefore, that’s not my role.
It’s something that I’ve recently had to come to terms with, in regard to my writing. I am wrapping up a Master’s program in writing, taught by many of the literary luminaries of our time, one of whom has been honored with a Pulitzer. These are smart writers. And, you know what? I’m not. Oh, I can write a compelling short story full of dry wit and irony, with a death or two thrown in for good measure, but what always resonates with readers the most is when I’m myself—chatty, funny, honest.
And the more I’ve stopped trying to be something that I’m not, and simply embraced and moved toward what I am, without judgement, the more magical and beautiful my life has become. I do believe that we each have a purpose, a unique set of gifts that help to make the world a more palatable place. Our job isn’t to judge what those gifts are, but to simply give them.
Thank you for being part of my 2010…I can’t wait to see what magic we create in 2011.
Love,
Miranda
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